Friday, November 15, 2019
Francesco DiMitri Eulogy
As you all know, we’ve been gathering like this all too often lately. My cousin Frank is usually the one up here speaking words about our dearly departed, understandably it would be difficult for him to speak words today, so… it was an obvious choice to have me fill in as his stunt double.
Francesco “Cicchio” Di Mitri, son, Dad, Brother, Cognato, Uncle, grandpa, great grandfather, friend, co-worker and loving husband to my dear Aunt Francis.
Born 1927 in Monreale, Prov of Palermo in Sicily, he came to the U.S. in 1959 settling in Lodi New Jersey. This is where…he would meet the love of his life, Francesca Pernice, another Sicilian immigrant born just over an hour away from Monreale in Ciminna, who also happened to settle in Lodi. They would eventually be married for 53 years before my aunt’s passing. Legend has it that when a young Frank came to my grandfather’s house to ask for his daughter’s hand in marriage, grandpa told him "I don't have any daughters to give away”. They did marry and moved to Elmwood Park in 1965 where they raised my cousins, Phil and Frank.
He was a first class machinist for ServoMeter in Cedar Grove, where he worked hard for forty one years before retiring in 2014, well into his 80’s. He was a true craftsman and a jack of all trades. Hard work, decency, reliability, honor, class, dignity, respect: these are all qualities he not only held in high esteem, but practiced every day during his time on this earth. He was a serious and disciplined man. As his granddaughter Jessica wrote in a beautiful post… ”He fixed things that were broken instead of replacing them”…she says “I admired him for the hard-working family man that he was, and I loved him. He was classy, smart, strong, tough, brave, and loud as hell.” My uncle Frank could yell with the best of them. Whether he was yelling at us for going upstairs on Christmas eve, complaining about produce at Corrado’s or just speaking passionately about things he deeply cared about.”
What did he care deeply about? Three things come to mind… Fashion, Food, and Family.
Fashion. He embodied the true definition of a dapper don. I mean who else could pull off a Russian Fur hat with a houndstooth blazer. He could rock white slacks and capezio’s like an Italian gangster. If David Chase, creator of the Sopranos, only knew he had a real-life Uncle Junior right under his nose he never would have casted Dominic Cianese for the role. Another quote from Jessica “He was always dressed to the nines. He was the type of man who owned expensive Italian shoes that were 50 years old without a scuff on them.” He was meticulous. I recently learned that he would dress up to go to work, once he got there he would change into his work clothes, put in a hard day’s work, change back into his dress clothes, and head home for the day. Long before professional athletes were mixing fashion with their profession. He dressed with class and confidence.
Food. When I think of my uncle Frank I can always reflect on the many amazing Food memories in the basement kitchen in Elmwood Park. For many of us growing up, Christmas Eve was such an amazing culinary experience. I can still hear the train going by as you headed down the carpeted stairs to the smells of great food. My brother Kevin said it best, “my aunt and uncle would manage to bring the essence and culture of Sicily to Dapp Court in Elmwood Park NJ.” He goes on to say “I remember as a little kid I was watching Uncle Frank cook a bunch of whole octopus. I was fascinated and terrified at the same time. If that wasn’t scary enough, he went on to bite the head off one of the Octopus’s and ate it.” He took pleasure in breaking bread with loved ones, loved pasta like no other, and enjoyed a glass of wine with his dinner.
Some signature dishes include…
Cooked Octopus, Fried artichokes, Arancini, Spedini, Pasta di Sardi, Trippa, Panne panelle, Cardoons, his famous cured olives, he may not have made desserts but I also always remember his love for gelato and buying Italian ice in Harrison ave in Garfield and of course the inis and cartoci he would get from Maria’s Bakery on Market St in Saddle Brook, always to share with those he loved.
Chef Mark, I’m so thankful you decided to pursue a career in the culinary arts and have that passion for cooking great food. I know you will carry this tradition with you and put the same care, love, heart and soul into the food you make, like both your grandparents once did.
Family. My Uncle was a straightforward family man who demanded little from those around him, completely content spending time with those he loved so dearly. His love for his two boys was always evident whenever he spoke about them. He was proud of them. He was also proud of each and every one of his grandchildren and especially fortunate to become a great grandfather. I believe it gave him such joy dancing with his granddaughters. What a gift of fortune to be able to travel with his sons to his home in Sicily, and especially the pride it must have given him to go with his granddaughters. A truly rare gift.
The one thing that will stick with me the most is the love and care he gave toward my aunt during her final days. Jessica said it best…”The last few years of my grandmother’s life, he was by her side every second - doting on her, caring for her, loving her, and seeing her through to the other side.”
Uncle Frank, you are a true Sicilian legend in my mind. An amazing soul that brought joy and fulfillment to many, and whose legacy will live on forever.
You will be dearly missed. Rest in peace.
